Heart truth

Abyssal truth


Following your heart. What does it mean?

Other then listening totally to our mind’s chattering logic to act out life. One should place more emphasis on the emotions of our heart and acting life through it.


Listen to your heart. Can the heart talk?

Our heart talk in the language of emotions. As most are used to the sensation of our mind thinking, feeling our heart’s talk may be like getting used to a foreign language. Constant awareness of the sadness and joy that arises from the heart integrates our knowing on what it wants. In time this will be a second nature to oneself.


Why is listening to our heart talk important?

Our heart intricately links to our soul, it talks the language of our soul. The intelligence is divine for the soul purpose of our life time. Directed by one’s inner divine intelligences is a way to one’s own life purpose. Everyone’s life purpose is different and it is already there in you. Seeking within is the true way to lead a real life according to our soul’s plan.


Living out of sync with our heart truth?

Ever had a moment in life that a truth in you will triggered the people around, shake the current relationship with close one or even rock our love ones?

One can deny their own truth by sticking with the flow of society norm, cultural standard or basic protocol of human conduct. So that one conform to masses acceptance and pleasing the world around them, in the hope that they will not be wrong. The fear of being wrong is so huge that they deny the reality in their heart. This seems to be an easier path for a start but it may be a hollow one as one cannot feel truly fulfilled.

Denying the truth from our heart in a way deny ourself in totality. A person that deny themselves denies their real existences hence dis-empowering  their own power of their authenticity. A self dis-empowered person is like a zombie in life as they are not in total connection to their soul. And hence they will not be on the path of their soul’s purpose.


Living in sync with our heart truth?

Being living in sync with our heart’s truth set one on a journey towards one’s soul purpose. This journey will come with moment of fear and contentment, sadness and joy, high and low. This is be like an adventure trip that our soul have sign on this package of life.

The difficult moment of the journey comes when following our heart means rocking others’ life. With one’s truest intent of authenticity and compassion. One may need to bared through our barrier of huge fear and pain to stand tall for one’s truth. Proudly be in the skin of who we are truly. The never ending challenge, learning and fulfilment will be the ride of our life. Real fulfilment will be the rewarding juice that nourishes  our soul.


Abyssal truth?

Communicate truth under the depth of abyssal pressure. (True strength).





In the world of gods and demi gods. In a society of advance civilisation, living at the fore front of evolution. At the peak of consciousness awakening in all of the universe, we are just one step shy of total awakening. I am the captain of the elite team of protector. Protector for our civilisation, our people and our king.

Today is an extremely joyous day as we reach a new frontier in our evolutionary advancement. We are unveiling our state of the art new fighter spacecraft to the universe. This new spacecraft once merge with a pilot will have the energy capacity of the sun. Imagine the full power of the sun being directed by a single pilot. This will be a showcase of the awesome advancement of our civilisation. I feel so proud to be a part of this.

My moment of blissful thoughts was being jolted to the present moment from a sudden sounding of a messenger. The messenger came forth to inform that our King had called for me.

The interior of the King’s palace is adorn with intricate architecture of gold and silver. The opulence and extravagance of the design and sheer magnitude exudes the sense of awe to all. My King is already at his throne awaiting. I reached before him and kneel in respect to his sacredness.

“Raised Captain, you have been chosen to pilot our newest spacecraft codename GARUDA.” “You are to showcase our pride on our civilisation’s evolutionary advancement to all of the universe.” “Go forth and do me proud, captain.” Said the King.

Then I was brought to the golden chamber hosting GARUDA, it is there shining with great pride. I was touched by the grace of my King bestowing the greatest gift of my life. To merge and pilot GARUDA is the greatest honour that anyone in our land can have. That moment I vowed to protect, serve and do honour for my King, my people and our civilisation with my all of my life and soul.

I places my hand on GARUDA and it opens up a portal for me. I went inside to allow merging to be initiated. Immediately the surged of power going through all of my different levels of body got me totally overwhelmed. The intensity of its potential  is wildly beyond my wildest imagination. My physical, emotional, mental, astral, etheric, celestial and ketheric body went into a power overwhelming state. The merging brought to me the true knowing of the magnitude of real power of the sun. Our merging took the longest while and finally we are ready to showcase the pride of our civilisation. I am ready.

In the speed of light I have surge out of our homeland towards the sun. The sheer mass and power of the sun felt intimidating. But the surge of power within GARUDA is so overwhelming that everything seems possible. We decided to shut down the sun’s light for a fleeting moment to showcase to the universe of our evolutionary advancement. I will gather all the power within GARUDA to stop all of the sun’s light ray for a moment. It took a long moment for me to fully charged up GARUDA and when it hit peak power. We unleashed a thunder bolt of energy so intensely powerful that it stop all of the sun’s ray from shining out. That instance the sun turn pitch black.

It work. A huge sense of honour runs through my body, shining the pride of our civilisation. As celebration of achievement and pride run through my mind, I saw energy cracks appearing in the black sun. This phenomenon does not look right. My eyes are wide open as the sun exploded. The explosion is so loud that I am deaf to it. The explosion is so bright that I am blinded to it. Time starts to slow down as I witness the destruction of the sun, the explosion also destroyed the planets around and even my homeland. Everything is destroyed, my homeland, civilisation, people and King. Death is everywhere. As I float motionlessly in space a black hole of guilt, sorrow and hollowness chokes me awake.

Suddenly my eyes are wide open realising that I was awaken from an intense dream.









Bitter Juice Purging


Many years ago.

A 9 years old was with an angry father in a room. Sensing his impending danger, the child screams for help and pleading for his life. The angry eyes of the man just became angrier. There will not be mercy, there will only be the pain of the punishment. The man started shouting at the child. “Why are you so lazy!”. “Why are you getting 70 marks for spelling!”. “Why do you have to make me so angry that I have to punished you!”. “Stop screaming!”.

The child started running around the room for escape but found the door locked. Outside the door are his mother and grandmother pleading mercy for him. His fear was exacerbate by his powerless saviours. Then he notice a stinging pain on his leg. The man started canning him. The shock and pain startled him and he scramble to escape. Screaming in fear for mercy. The man cornered him and shouted. ” The more you scream or run the more painful this will be!”. Facing the towering threat, massive fear paralyse his small body. There was no voice or movement but a torrential rain of canning. Pain overload his senses till he was frozen. Dried rivers of tear, whimper of shame, lashes of cane print and a bleeding cane mark on a ankle is the remainder of the aftermath.

The angry man left the room and his 2 powerless saviour rushes in to soothes any fear or pain. The caring words and soothing medication does little. Little did they know, the child have already frozen his fear, helplessness, pain and shame of the mad moment into a part of himself.


Many years later.

At an inner studies workshop. A man was deepening into himself to identify his lower self. He identified with manipulator, conformist, blockage and defeat in him. As he deepens he realised that his conformist is his defence mechanism to manipulate others, so that he will not faced with tough and fearful situation. He discover that he has been living as a conformist throughout his life. That means he have not live authentically. Suddenly a childhood memories flashes through. The one that he was caned by his father in a locked room. A huge grief and pain overwhelm him into tears. There is a knowing that his life till now has been orchestrated by this frozen child. The fear, helplessness, pain and shame that have been freeze into a part of him that yearns safety and have devise those lower self characters.


Having the clarity this man is ready to go deeper into healing this frozen child part. As his parent and grandparent have already pass on. His teacher and guides ask him what will he tell them if they are in front of him. Tears started overflowing as an impending energies from the thawing frozen part seems to be unleashing. He shouted out with full anger and rage ” I HATE YOU!”. With that he collapsed into an avalanche of pain, shame and helpless crying. These seems to be a released of the emotions that is frozen when he was a child.


Suddenly he was awaken to the big hole in his heart.  Green slimy juice of bitterness is flowing out of it. It was a terrible feeling. But there is a knowing that this is the start of his healing process. The heart will never know love when it is filled with bitterness.





At a time before homo sapiens and at a place where there is no civilisation. A golden pyramid with the Eye of Horus stand witnessing the interplay of time and space in front of the great sea of consciousness. Lying beneath the depth of darkness lies a soulful being. A mammal with a powerful gift of communication. An ancient hump back whale. It has been hibernating for the longest of time in the cold dark sea. Time passes ever so slowly and yet aeon have slip by without a hint of awakening from it.

Not only is this mammal in hibernation, the whole planet is in a deep hibernation phase. This planet is so huge that the day and night cycle are many aeons apart. Aeons of night darkness have passed and the light of the day is approaching. First ray of light diluted the pitch black darkness slowly towards visibility. Visibility returns to the land and then slowly into the sea. As the first ray of light hit on the whale, its nervous system was firing awakening signals throughout its massive body. It gives out a longest grunt and started twitching its body awake, its eyes slowly open. Then it started to surface itself , guided by the sun’s ray which peeks into the sea.

There is a blazing red kingfisher perching at the top of the pyramid. The red flame surrounding it is burning with deep passion of life. Upon sensing a big shadow ascending towards the surface of the sea, it flew over out of curiosity. Hovering itself high above the big shadow underwater, awaiting to witness something huge.

Meanwhile the whale is gaining acceleration as it ascent towards the surface. It notices a bright burning red spot high up above the water, that piqued it’s curiosity. Nearing the surface of the sea at top speed, it did a powerful flip with it’s massive tail and huge fins. It propel itself out of the sea and breach itself high up into the air, awaiting to witness something huge.

The whale breach so high up that it is a just a moment away from the kingfisher. They were both startle in awe of the magnificent of each other. Their amazing gaze last an eternity of seconds before gravity came to do them apart.

The massive whale fell back into the sea creating an explosion of sea water into this place. The first sound of awakening resonating throughout the aeon of quietness. The first dance of awakening.


The above scene came into mind when I was drawing this. In a symbolic terms it felt like at the transition of awakening, there are 2 primal force in play. Passion and power. The moment these 2 energies start to awake to each others existence. The moment they attract and seduce each other into a dance. The flame of consciousness starts to dance into life.





Fear & Courage

emperor new clothes


The emperor’s new clothes is a short tale by Hans Christian Andersen. Below is it’s plot from wikipedia.

A vain Emperor who cares about nothing except wearing and displaying clothes hires two swindlers who promise him the finest, best suit of clothes from a fabric invisible to anyone who is unfit for his position or “hopelessly stupid”. The Emperor’s ministers cannot see the clothing themselves, but pretend that they can for fear of appearing unfit for their positions and the Emperor does the same. Finally the swindlers report that the suit is finished, they mime dressing him and the Emperor marches in procession before his subjects. The townsfolk play along with the pretense, not wanting to appear unfit for their positions or stupid. Then a child in the crowd, too young to understand the desirability of keeping up the pretense, blurts out that the Emperor is wearing nothing at all and the cry is taken up by others. The Emperor cringes, suspects the assertion is true, but continues the procession.


This is such a great tale with rich teachings. To me it is a symbolic story about fear & courage. The emperor is fearful of facing his truth. In search of his passion for vanity he was swindled and to protect his fear of being look upon as stupid, vain and in shame. He can go through a phase of anger where his ministers or subjects whom dares to laugh at him will be dealt with. The emperor has a high responsibility and therefore high power. Hence an angry emperor will caused fear in his ministers and subjects. In fear of their current comfort, stability and life, they will closed their eyes, their mouth and their ears to the reality of truth.

As the young boy started laughing at the emperor for being naked, the rest of the people watches on in horror. So petrified by the possible repercussion of the emperor’s rage.  The truth has been brought out by that young boy.

At this moment shame, guilt and fear is overwhelming everyone especially the emperor.

Will he cover his fear by anger and silence all whom had triggered him or by pretending that the boy is insane?

Or will he have the courage to acknowledge his fear by ending his procession and dealing with his swindlers?


When face with fearful situations, one can either pretend that it is not there, be angry with something else or brave through towards the source to heal it. The journey from fear to courage are everywhere in life. But the one that we are passionate about is always worth the journey through the shame, guilt and fear. Being courageous for our own truth is a great way to start any moment.





Frogs in a hot pot. High heat will scare them away, jumping out of the hot pot to discover other kind of life. Low heat creates a cosy environment that the frogs turn unconscious to their reality. A nice sauna with beautiful flower prints on the surface of the pot. So fearful to even move an inch and before they knew it, they are already part of the frog stew.

The frogs from the bottom of the stack are already dead but they had their living moments before. Moments where they are alive, holding on their life for their mighty frog empire. Their fear of not conforming to the masses before them made them conform to their act. Stories of folklore are passed on generation to generation and their stories slowly turn into legend. Legend states that all honourable frog with their honourable deed of ensuring the frog kingdom to stack up towards the sky. That will enable the king frog to assess the danger of the world outside their homeland(which is the pot). So that the king can save all honourable frogs.

The frogs that are still alive at the middle of the stack. They have to take the weight from the rest on the top, unhappy and unsatisfied with their lives. But their warmish environment is still comfortable enough for they to willingly hang on to the pressure. Legend has it that all honourable frog has been bestowed with the responsibilities of holding their place and upholding their stack for the frog empire.

A frog in the middle that is still alive have a thought flashing by it’s mind. “How comfortable it will be to get out of this stack to relieve myself of the pressure on me”. Suddenly grimacing in pain, it knows that it is having an unholy thought. Paralyse in fear as it’s so called honourable part came in to instil discipline. Having such an unholy thought, I am a sinner and I will have to banished all unholy thoughts and strictly hold my place in stack till the ends of my honourable life. So that I will be save.

Frogs near the top of the stack can see a glimpse of the world outside the pot at times when their views are not blocked by the body or the shit of the king frog. To them the world outside seems so strange and scarily cold. Will we be freeze to death in this strange outside world? Better wait for the king to tell us what to do. Legend have stated that our king will be able to save us. For honour, I better dispel my shameful unholy thoughts.

The king frog on the other hand is having a great time of its life, shitting and resting on the rest of the frogs below. I wander why are there so many frogs laying below me. Maybe they are enjoying this warm cosy feeling. Well as long as they are happy, I am happy for them. Croak…………..  🙂





Parallax Error (he)
Parallax Error (she)


If seeing is believing then true communication is at its primitive form. Parallax error describes a reality that is different from what one sees at pure sight. Parallax error is not subjected only to visual, it can be translated into our other senses. Imagine when all sensing errors adds up to an avalanching mismatch to reality, one will easily lost our grounding.

In the context of love and sex (creation), human society came up with marriage to bind all these expression into a box. To contain these powerful energies from 2 individuals in a box of marriage is not easy but I guess necessary to create a certain society order.  The individual’s own parallax error to reality creates another set of uncertainty into this box. Highly charged and unstable energies can easily explode the box or numb itself so much that the box turn cold into an implosion. Is our current pursuit of marrying our energy of love and sex an ideal way for our evolution?

Looking at love per se. Love is an universal expression of enjoyment and affection. One have the capacity to love a lot and much more. Embracing and loving of everything seems possible. That only means that directing love on only a singular point is albeit to forcing an energy so wide and diverse to a containment. That does not feel natural.

Looking at sex per se. It is fundamentally an universal energy of creation. As we humans currently comes in dual forms, nature has it that male and female have a part to play in this expression to harness this energy to the birth of a new existences. Our bodies are build to the attunement for the longing of sex. In a sense when it wasn’t functioning that purpose in life then isn’t it in conflict with nature. This felt like a flower bud that was not allowed to flower. How constricted and sad is this?

Hence boxing love and sex into a package rather then allowing them to express as individual expression may seems to create an unstable box of marriage. And I ponder whether this man conceived structure of marriage is a suitable vehicle for current and future evolution of mankind. With the increases of awareness one may see that marriage structure is fear based by default. It subjects and exercise control on 2 individuals in the name of man conceive sacredness. Controlling and conforming their energy of love and sex in a way in to a box. Creating an order out of this naturally uncontrollable interplay of energies of the 2 sexes seems an impossible task.

Natural selection and sexual selection is nature’s way of exercising its influence to create a natural flow for all species. Conscious awakening may be Mother nature’s way of selection for human. Critical mass awakening may create a situation where mass consciousness starts to see the fallacy to our age old approached to our society order and structure. Expression of love, sex and definition of marriage may be one of them.

Conscious awakening enable one to realised one’s parallax error and at the same time realised others’ in the similar situation. Being in consistent awareness of self, do one starts to realise oneself deeper. Through the realising comes the knowing which will give birth to newer realisation, to which one will start a motion of conscious evolution.

Borrowing a quote. Lets “Stay hungry, stay foolish”.




“Never point your finger at the moon or else the moon god will  cut your ears tonight”, says grandma in a serious tone. The young me obeyed without questioning. Grandma is always right. There is an incident after this, that I pointed at the moon accidentally and I freaked out. The fear of my ears dropping out, hounded me constantly through the day. I will be touching my ears frequently to check if they are still there. That night I cant sleep as I was so fearful that my ears will be lost once I fall asleep. The tormenting fear kept me holding to my ears and fighting my sleep monster to stay awake.

The next moment I woke up in horror, realising that I have fallen asleep unknowingly. I clasped my ears with both hands and felt relief that they are still there.  The moon god did not to cut my ears and as I sigh in relief, then a stinging pain came from behind my left ear. It felt and looks like a fresh wound. An abrasion that I did not notice yesterday. It must have been the moon god. So frighten by this that I rush to tell grandma on the happening. Then she chuckles awhile telling me that the moon god must have just given me a warning this time. So I better be obedient and not to do it again else I may lost my ears.

The pain, the happening and grandma’s words sink in so deep in me that I became so conscious of my pointing finger. Never dare to randomly  point to the sky as I may again point at the moon accidentally. This taboo live with me for ages till my young adult years. I only mustered enough courage to test this taboo after learning much scientific facts on the moon. It is only then that I have this myth busted. I remembered clearly at that night of the testing I still had a nudging fear in me. And I have only dispel the fears of this taboo after many moons of testing and self proving.

Indeed taboo can be like a living curse for a person. Limiting their physicality, limiting their mentality, limiting them to a space that have been pre define. Taboo can have such a grip on a person that can transcend time, space in our mental and physical dimension.

In this moon pointing taboo that I experience, it must have passed down from my grandma’s parents or grandparents. And they must likely have received it from their parents or grandparents. Who knows how far the origin of this taboo is in time and how wide the reached is in space. God knows why is there a taboo like this created? A troll, a belief or even a miscommunication.

The thing is that if I have not challenge the fear of this taboo. Then to this day when someone ask where is the moon, I will point my chin to show the direction rather then my fingers. How sad is this, that I am held hostage to this taboo that may only be a joke from someone long before me.

Whenever one feels fearful or shameful  by a topic, a situation or even a thought. One most probably have a taboo on it. Taboo is like a red tape that cordon off the surrounding that one is restricted too. It restrict the flow of life. Restricting life only to the area that is lighted by the taboo and the areas restricted by the taboo is dark as it is protected by fear and shame.

Facing our taboo is a path facing one’s fear and shame. Casting our courageous light towards the darkness of our taboo will create and make more space for our life. Breaking our cage of ignorances and allow our life to grow in abundance. Let there be courage to switch on our torch light of bravery and to explore beyond the shadows cast by our taboo.



Past Lives



Stories, myth and legends are bountiful expressions of spirit that live through time and space. Different dimensions, different beings and different existences are the expression of one’s soul journey.

How can we only be limited to this body and this current identity, how small is that. We are soul experiencing life as different beings, different existences in multi dimension, expressing the richness of spirit. We travel through the life and death of each of our identities, dancing to the tune of spirit.

Are there stories, dreams or myth characters that move you to bits? So attached that you feel their emotions, dreams and desires. So identified with it that you felt that character is really you. Not this current you but a you once upon a time.


I have 2 separate high definition dreams with stories that are connected and intensely heart felt to share.


1st dream:

I found myself submerge under water. I was not suffocating and actually I felt rather calm and relax in water. The next moment I realised that I head up to swim towards the surface of the water. There is a floating structure on the surface, I can see many multi coloured transparent looking buoy tied around the circumference of that floating structure. Those colourful buoy attracted much of my attention. Red, yellow, green and blue buoy floating to the waves on the surface. I float up to poked at the buoys, playing with them. After my curiosity was settled, I pop my head out of the water surface. I found myself almost 300 meters away from the most beautiful stretches of white untainted beach paradise. There is no people or other living being other then the vegetation on these beautiful beaches. It is a sunny day and felt like around noon as the sun is high up in the sky. I then tilted my head up to look at the sun, I saw it, it look the same. But there is this strange knowing that came through my mind. This is a time before human civilisation. Homo sapiens have not been evolved here yet. But this sun is the same sun that me as a human has seen before. A very surreal moment of familiar warm sunlight caressing my skin and yet this is a time so ancient. At the corner of my vision a pyramid was spotted towering behind the vegetation on the beach, It does not feel like the one I had seen in Egypt. It seems bigger and had a massive “Eye of Ra” engraving on the side facing the sea. Such a strange place of odd familiarity, why am I here, I thought.

Then I started to descend down again. Visibility under water was so clear and beautiful, the scene that I was at is miles of clear white sand and crystal clear blue sea water. In front of me was this huge underwater structure that I can only see a small portion, it felt like a huge pyramid kind of structure. Something then swam into my sight and she is the loveliest baby humpback whale. Smiling so sweetly at me. She glide towards the right side of my body and gently nudge at me, she slightly tilted her head giving me her loving smile before swimming behind me.  She is my baby. I then realised that I am a hump back whale.


2nd dream:

Looking down from the sky, I saw the back of a massive whale shark in the ocean. Then the next moment I saw a dead hump back whale beaching on an island. The water is crystal clear and the ocean is calm but there is this deep sadness in the air. Suddenly I was rewind into the moment before the death of the whale. I am viewing from under water once again, massive waves of underwater current and millions of air bubbles are created as the hump back whale and the whale shark charge and slam their bodies into each other. The impact of their charging created so much under water pressure that it explode into thousands stream of undercurrent and million of air bubbles gushing out of the impact zone. Both of them stall for almost a second or two before the huge battle get started again as they swing their massive tail and flippers as weapons attacking each other. Ramming their head into each other’s bodies.

A thought came in, ” What happened?”. Then  in a far distance I saw that familiar baby hump back whale. She seems fearful for her life. A sudden knowing flashes by, the whale shark is out to kill the baby whale hence the mother whale is protecting it with her life.

Then my view came back to the massive fight. In a bid to protect her precious baby. The mummy whale did a breaching so high out of the surface of the sea and  back flip and slam her back into the whale shark. Then their actions stopped and there is quietness for the longest while. That flying back slam have heavily injured the whale shark and at the same time crack the backbone of the hump back whale. The injured whale shark swam away from their fighting site and the hump back laid there dying away from her injury.

Carried by the waves, the dying whale is being slowly washed up to the shores. She have no more energy to resist death and is just slowly dying away. The baby whale’s cries fills the water as she nudges at her mother’s huge body. Trying the best to push her away from the shores, she is too small to have the strength to do that.

The sounds and feeling of her cries and her grieving are so overwhelming that I was choked awake from my own crying. My face are all wet with tears but it was not only due to the grief from the baby whale. A bigger part of the grief that I am experiencing is the pain and grief from the mother hump back whale. As she is lying motionlessly dead, she still feels the intense pain, grief and fear of her baby’s well being. As death do them apart, a pain is unleashed from a mother’s love for her baby that she can no longer protect.


These 2 dreams make me wonder much. Why do I identify myself so much with that hump back whale? Why do I feel its emotion so intensely? Why do I have a knowing of it’s story in so much detail? Why are my 2 separate dreams connected in such a way? So many question that my logical mind cannot comprehend and make sense of. Allowing the curious part of me to ask these questions, I am allowing more answers to come in from all my senses.

There is this huge part of me that accepts reincarnation, lives after lives and past lives. How rich is this if my hunch is right on track. How beautiful is life and how different we will each view, live and act out of our current one. If we all truly knows this secret of life. In the mean time, being open to our intuition helps to allow the flow of this mystical sense and knowing to expand. May us all be bless with the clarity of true knowing.



Night Traveller


Ever walk into an unknown dark room feeling your way for a light switch?

The fear of the unknown.

The fear of sensing what that may be lurking in that darkness.

In the time between walking into the dark room till one finds the light switch is a journey through darkness.

Every thing that we graze past or hit upon during the darkness may scare the shit out of us for a split second or more.

Every new sensation that hit upon us, be it a fluffy teddy bear or steel cold furniture gives us an initial creepy feeling. Evoking our emotion of fear. The seed of fear can grow pretty fast, is it a thing that touches me or is it a living thing that touches me or worse is it a non living being that touches me. Our mind will go into a fear overdrive mode making us scream in silence or shout out in pure fear. Our body may freeze into immobility or sprint into a flight mode jolting out of that dark room.

We may even closed our eyes and play dead in the hope of stopping our fear.


Is our life’s journey not in a way a journey through the dark room?

We all want control of the future which we had no real control. Clenching our fist in a dark room may be a way to soothes our fear for what is to come.

It is a way we think it may help us to control our fear or control the future.  But it actually hardens and numb our senses to experience what is to come, hence tricking ourself to believe that we are in control.

We trick ourself to believe that we have powers to control the outcome. Wanting to control our future is really an expression of our fear of the unknown. It may be the greatest trick that one play on oneself. As one try to believe that they can truly control, which there is none. Their approach is through numbing themselves of their senses and living in the moment not present. They starts to become zombies of life, not being able to experience the present moment.


I started growing a pot of sweet potatoes last year. I bought good soil, big pot, good water and good care for it. It grew up beautifully, gracing my big pot to look like a bountiful garden. I continue on my good work in the hope to maintain this beautiful sight. But then it fall prey to some parasites late last year. I tried to control the situation but to no avail. To my horror it started dying. I am so sad to realise that I have no power to maintain that beautiful scene. The beautiful sight of my big pot changes to a theme of death. My sweet potato plant turns yellowish and died. I stop putting in any effort of gardening my pot as I surrender to the fact that I can’t maintain it beautifully. Few month past by and something miraculous happen with no effort on my part. The pot was again filled with beautiful plants which I had no idea, what it is. It is definitely not sweet potato plant.  Grace by the power of nature.

Through this episode I realised that I had no real control. Surrendering the thought of control may birth something more amazing. The Cycle of up and down, life and death, happy and sorrow is but the nature of life in motion. Relinquish the desire for outcome, just witness and act from the present moment adds depth to the life story that we are experiencing.


May all soar through darkness in calmness. Embracing the wind of life that gazes through our senses. What will be will be. Enjoy your ride.